Second, I spent some time last night reading articles on the Quiverfull website (http://www.quiverfull.com/). I think it's interesting, and I'm fascinated by people who have very large (10+ kids) families. There were some things that struck me when I followed some of the links. The big thing was that I saw a couple of places (on forums) where the moms would say something to the effect of 'I AP'ed my first and second, but by the time the rest of them came along, I couldn't keep them all in line without spanking.' I had to sleep on that one a little. I mean, I'm open to a big family if we can afford them. But if I have to raise them like that, I dunno. IME with some of these bigger families (who usually use the Pearls' book for child training methods), the kids are all really well behaved, but they have no personality--zero spark. Everything's yes ma'am, no ma'am, which I don't have a problem with per se, but I don't think a 'May I please have a reason or explanation for this command?' is unreasonable. Maybe it's because I was a "strong-willed child" myself.
I don't believe that spanking is something the God commands us to do. I don't believe that being a Christian parent requires me to hit my child(ren). I believe I can raise my child to be an intelligent, Christian (if he so chooses, which I hope he does), responsible member of society without having to hit him.
In conclusion, I'd rather have 4 kids gently raised than 10 kids I've had to spank.
1 comment:
Hey Lindsey :) I'm an AP'er and love what you learned about Barnes and Noble! That's so cool! Thanks for sharing :)
I am a Christian AP'er and have had serious issues with spanking. I was a spanked child and have spanked our children and have gone through very large periods of time without spanking them (my kids are ages 8, 6, almost 4 and 1). We're in a non-spanking mode right now and I definitely think this is best. I guess I decided to write you because you said, "I had to sleep on that" when you mentioned the QF and I think that is a very mature, and non-judgemental way to be. Anyway, I want to encourage you to continue to use grace in your opinions of families who spank.....especially the QF'ers. I'm not exactly QF but would be if my husband lined up with that way of thinking. He's NFP but not QF. So...as you see, I'm just an opinionated gal that wanted to say 'hi' and give an unrequested .02 (actually, you DO have a comments space for a reason don't you? :)
OK...bottom line point of my comment -- non-spanking is definitely best but spanking is not all wrong in and of itself. I do believe that there have been times my spanking my children has been completely appropriate (swat on bottom for complete defiance in those terrible testing 3s) and questionably necessary but more often than not, my past spankings have been completely INappropriate. Appropriate spankings do not harm children and provide the lesson-learning nudge that is needed. Other forms might be used and work as well. I will agree that I seriously doubt Christ would ever spank a child and for that reason, I find it hard to fully 'thumbs-up' spanking across the board.
Hope to read you again soon!
Post a Comment