It all started when Kimmy, a teacher, posted a limerick written by one of her students. A limerick minus some valuable syllables was posted by another loop member. I was going to respond with a limerick, but they're hard, and I'm not about to take an hour coming up with a 5 line, multi-syllabic bit for the loop, as fast as it moves. Haiku is doable.
Thus,
Haiku Battle 2006
Me: Kim is a teacher
She works very hard on things
She prefers good dick
Kimmy: hard dick
Me:Whatever you say
I want points for my haiku
Give them to me now
Kimmy: Listen snarky bitch
I am grading this bullshit
Take this and like it
Me: I will take ice cream
No more, no less for me, please
I want chocolate
Kimmy: Just ate M and Ms
John ate gallon of ice cream
Too much fat for him
Me: I'm eating noodles
They have lots of ranch on them
Broccoli hurts me
Kimmy: Please no more haikus
Consonants are annoying
Stupid assignment
Me: It is not my fault
Limericks are much harder
You started it, bia
Shel: Fat free popcorn here
I lost 4.8 this week
Not rubbing it in
Me: Congratulations
You are on your way to slim
Popcorn sounds very good
Kimmy: I've created a monster.
Me: You have not done so
I have discovered my love
Such a simple prose
Kissy: today i looked down at my long sleeved black shirt and it looked like a garden slug had made its way down my arm.
Shel: you are the most poetic of the bitches (sorry, L)
Me: The haiku monster
Has returned to take revenge
Yea, I shall triumph
Kimmy: yes i wanted sex
but he fell asleep again
ah so much for that
My last entry for the night, sadly, highly relevant. He's batting at his ears again, I'll have to take him for a recheck tomorrow.
Amoxicillin
The pink stuff in use again
Ear infections suck
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
So there was this post
About car seats and safety. And it got locked and it was because some people are completely incapable of reading posts objectively. Does the phrase "blah blah blah" indicate basic respect and courtesy for the words to which it is the response? I think no.
Anyway, since I didn't get a chance to respond before the Blah Blah Blah-er got the thread locked, I'll post it here, since it was a darn good post--WhinyPerson comments in italics, comments from Myself in green :
WhinyPerson wrote:
blah blah blah...lol...just wanted to say something...lol...this subject is way heavy, can't we just leave it at we get what we want, and car seats now are a lot safer than they used to be, and just pray that we never have to test out the safety of any of them...
This is in the Hot Topics forum for the very reason that it is a heavy subject. Debates are often circular and can take a while to wind themselves down, as this one obviously is.
WhinyPerson wrote: good lord it's seems like it's being said that if you don't have a certain seat a certain way your child is gonna die and that it's your fault for putting them in that seat..bah...
I'm sorry that's the impression you've gotten. The bottom line is that a child is at considerably higher risk when improperly secured in an improperly installed car seat.
WhinyPerson wrote:
at least we are discussing the types of carseats not the lack thereof...I've seen several people riding down the highway with a young baby in their lap...
The point is that it is still unsafe to improperly secure a child in an improperly installed car seat.
Regarding forward vs rear-facing, I bet most of us that have chosen to keep our babies rear-facing past a year didn't know about the benefits of doing so until recently. I generally knew (through research via the internet of reputable websites) that it was safer, but I didn't realize just how much safer it was.
I don't know anyone who would call someone a bad mother for making a decision when they didn't know any better. The point of this is, now that the information has been made available, what will we do?
SomeOtherPersonWithWhomIGenerallyDisagree wrote:
Well if we want to get into the safety rating, then lets get into the car crash test safety ratings as well because if you are not driving the safest vehicle then you are putting your child in danger. Right?
The safety of various car seats depends on several factors. With the overhead shield type seats (see one here: http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=4645515), it's difficult to secure the child tightly enough in the seat, and it's been shown that 5-point seats are safer. Seats of this type only have three points, making it more difficult to secure the child properly.
For the rest of the 5-point harness seats, the place where safety ratings come into play is mainly in installation.
Consumer Reports bases much of their ratings on ease of install and ease of use. A seat that is difficult to install is obviously more likely to be installed incorrectly. Incorrectly installing said seat means the child is at greater risk of injury, therefore, the seat ends up with a lower rating by Consumer Reports. A seat that is easy to install but makes it difficult to properly secure the child (for instance, our spare Evenflo) will have a lower rating, too. For Baby Bargains' ratings, factors like how the company handled prior recalls and customer service enter the picture as well.
The main reason those of us who have Britax seats recommend them so highly is that not only do they perform very well in crash tests, but they are easy to install correctly in many vehicles, and the harness is designed in such a way that a secure fit for the child is very easy, too.
I've had a Graco, a Cosco, an Evenflo, and a Britax. For ease of use, I infinitely prefer the Britax.
That said, a correctly installed seat with a secure fit for your child is the safest way to go, be that a Britax or any other brand.
SomeOtherPersonWithWhomIGenerallyDisagree wrote:
If you want to get into statistics, no one should be driving anyway, it is very unsafe just for you to put yourself behind the wheel let alone put your child(ren) at that risk.
I think we would all agree that in this area, cars and driving are a necessary evil.
Me again--here's my PM to the Administrator of the Most Sensitive Forum of the Year:
Her:
Thanks in Advance for your cooperation . . . .This forum is now LOCKED!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me:
J, you know I love ya, but I have to express my displeasure at the locking of this thread.
It's a shame that it was not allowed to continue and resolve itself. Yeah, I'm probably miffed because I just spent an hour compiling a very polite post that included information on several seats (that I never got around to after discovering the thread was locked) and some deeper insight into how car seat safety ratings are established, and asking for clarification on some remarks, all without insulting anyone. I have the whole post copied and saved because it was a good one. LOL
The point is that people are going to read something into anything, and if someone wants to see "you're a bad mom" then they're gonna see it regardless of what is typed. Heck, it seems some people will translate "I think the sky is blue" into "you're a bad mom." :wink:
The locked topic was in a debate forum. If we are not allowed to make points and our debates are not allowed to complete themselves, then I fail to see how this forum will succeed. There are always going to be posts that get riled up on any message board (I oughta know, I've been on various boards for 7 years, and I think I've been through every debate topic to come up on a parenting board LOL), and they always resolve themselves. It may not be to the liking of everyone, but people do reach an understanding. I regret that that was not allowed to happen in this case. If threads that get heated continue to be shut down without resolution by the posters themselves, then I don't think this forum is going to get very far. Pretty soon no one will feel like they are able to express an opinion other than the one put forth by an original poster. The board will stagnate and that will be sad. I'm not speculating, I've seen it happen.
We are adults and fully capable of disagreeing without being hurtful. I didn't see anyone call names. I did see a poster asking for clarification of the comment "blah blah blah." Since it's usually meant as dismissive and disdainful of the quoted segment, I was going to ask for clarification of it in my post myself.
I didn't see anyone telling someone else that their kid's carseat was unsafe and nowhere did any poster call anyone else a bad mother. There is a lot of misinformation regarding car seats out there, and a lot of it was getting aired and corrected. I think the discussion was headed in a good direction. It's a shame it wasn't allowed to continue.
Even regarding the "not hurting others' feelings" rule for the board, I think it's a little impractical. It's inevitable that someone will get hurt over some perceived slight, and I think that's just one of the hazards of a written forum. I don't think a post should be pulled, edited, or locked because someone might get hurt when a post is misinterpreted.
Of course, all of this is just my opinion. ;)
Adding--I just noticed that the thread has been moved back to Parenting Concerns. Obviously I'm not an Admin, but I think it would have been just find to continue in the debate forum. It appears as though it was moved back to Parenting Concerns and then locked, which, IMO wasn't really fair to us as posters.
Normal me again. I was very tempted to add, after typing out all of that, then seeing how things went, "And there are some of us that are more articulate than others, and I see no reason why the inarticulate weenies should ruin it for the rest of us."
But I'm a good girl, so I didn't.
That said, my comments about stagnating forums are correct. As an example, my due date boards. Board A is very nice-nice, and no one disagrees on parenting things because they don't want to hurt feelings or make anyone feel like a bad mom or anything like that. Board B has some of the most unusual and noisiest debates on the Parenting Community. And we've debated it all. Board A is extremely slow these days, and there's nothing on it but "the baby cut another tooth" and "S/he's walking!" Board B is still having insightful and entertaining discussions on everything from WIC to Extended Nursing to American Idol to the lastest episode of Desperate Housewives. Board B used to be known as the "mean" board. Actually, after a car seat debate over there, in which Board B people came over and got snitty, it held on to the title of Mean Board. Anyway, I love Board B. Yeah, so we squabble and bitch and moan, but should one of our members be insulted by some other board, we've got their back. :)
Anyway, since I didn't get a chance to respond before the Blah Blah Blah-er got the thread locked, I'll post it here, since it was a darn good post--WhinyPerson comments in italics, comments from Myself in green :
WhinyPerson wrote:
blah blah blah...lol...just wanted to say something...lol...this subject is way heavy, can't we just leave it at we get what we want, and car seats now are a lot safer than they used to be, and just pray that we never have to test out the safety of any of them...
This is in the Hot Topics forum for the very reason that it is a heavy subject. Debates are often circular and can take a while to wind themselves down, as this one obviously is.
WhinyPerson wrote: good lord it's seems like it's being said that if you don't have a certain seat a certain way your child is gonna die and that it's your fault for putting them in that seat..bah...
I'm sorry that's the impression you've gotten. The bottom line is that a child is at considerably higher risk when improperly secured in an improperly installed car seat.
WhinyPerson wrote:
at least we are discussing the types of carseats not the lack thereof...I've seen several people riding down the highway with a young baby in their lap...
The point is that it is still unsafe to improperly secure a child in an improperly installed car seat.
Regarding forward vs rear-facing, I bet most of us that have chosen to keep our babies rear-facing past a year didn't know about the benefits of doing so until recently. I generally knew (through research via the internet of reputable websites) that it was safer, but I didn't realize just how much safer it was.
I don't know anyone who would call someone a bad mother for making a decision when they didn't know any better. The point of this is, now that the information has been made available, what will we do?
SomeOtherPersonWithWhomIGenerallyDisagree wrote:
Well if we want to get into the safety rating, then lets get into the car crash test safety ratings as well because if you are not driving the safest vehicle then you are putting your child in danger. Right?
The safety of various car seats depends on several factors. With the overhead shield type seats (see one here: http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=4645515), it's difficult to secure the child tightly enough in the seat, and it's been shown that 5-point seats are safer. Seats of this type only have three points, making it more difficult to secure the child properly.
For the rest of the 5-point harness seats, the place where safety ratings come into play is mainly in installation.
Consumer Reports bases much of their ratings on ease of install and ease of use. A seat that is difficult to install is obviously more likely to be installed incorrectly. Incorrectly installing said seat means the child is at greater risk of injury, therefore, the seat ends up with a lower rating by Consumer Reports. A seat that is easy to install but makes it difficult to properly secure the child (for instance, our spare Evenflo) will have a lower rating, too. For Baby Bargains' ratings, factors like how the company handled prior recalls and customer service enter the picture as well.
The main reason those of us who have Britax seats recommend them so highly is that not only do they perform very well in crash tests, but they are easy to install correctly in many vehicles, and the harness is designed in such a way that a secure fit for the child is very easy, too.
I've had a Graco, a Cosco, an Evenflo, and a Britax. For ease of use, I infinitely prefer the Britax.
That said, a correctly installed seat with a secure fit for your child is the safest way to go, be that a Britax or any other brand.
SomeOtherPersonWithWhomIGenerallyDisagree wrote:
If you want to get into statistics, no one should be driving anyway, it is very unsafe just for you to put yourself behind the wheel let alone put your child(ren) at that risk.
I think we would all agree that in this area, cars and driving are a necessary evil.
Me again--here's my PM to the Administrator of the Most Sensitive Forum of the Year:
Her:
Thanks in Advance for your cooperation . . . .This forum is now LOCKED!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me:
J, you know I love ya, but I have to express my displeasure at the locking of this thread.
It's a shame that it was not allowed to continue and resolve itself. Yeah, I'm probably miffed because I just spent an hour compiling a very polite post that included information on several seats (that I never got around to after discovering the thread was locked) and some deeper insight into how car seat safety ratings are established, and asking for clarification on some remarks, all without insulting anyone. I have the whole post copied and saved because it was a good one. LOL
The point is that people are going to read something into anything, and if someone wants to see "you're a bad mom" then they're gonna see it regardless of what is typed. Heck, it seems some people will translate "I think the sky is blue" into "you're a bad mom." :wink:
The locked topic was in a debate forum. If we are not allowed to make points and our debates are not allowed to complete themselves, then I fail to see how this forum will succeed. There are always going to be posts that get riled up on any message board (I oughta know, I've been on various boards for 7 years, and I think I've been through every debate topic to come up on a parenting board LOL), and they always resolve themselves. It may not be to the liking of everyone, but people do reach an understanding. I regret that that was not allowed to happen in this case. If threads that get heated continue to be shut down without resolution by the posters themselves, then I don't think this forum is going to get very far. Pretty soon no one will feel like they are able to express an opinion other than the one put forth by an original poster. The board will stagnate and that will be sad. I'm not speculating, I've seen it happen.
We are adults and fully capable of disagreeing without being hurtful. I didn't see anyone call names. I did see a poster asking for clarification of the comment "blah blah blah." Since it's usually meant as dismissive and disdainful of the quoted segment, I was going to ask for clarification of it in my post myself.
I didn't see anyone telling someone else that their kid's carseat was unsafe and nowhere did any poster call anyone else a bad mother. There is a lot of misinformation regarding car seats out there, and a lot of it was getting aired and corrected. I think the discussion was headed in a good direction. It's a shame it wasn't allowed to continue.
Even regarding the "not hurting others' feelings" rule for the board, I think it's a little impractical. It's inevitable that someone will get hurt over some perceived slight, and I think that's just one of the hazards of a written forum. I don't think a post should be pulled, edited, or locked because someone might get hurt when a post is misinterpreted.
Of course, all of this is just my opinion. ;)
Adding--I just noticed that the thread has been moved back to Parenting Concerns. Obviously I'm not an Admin, but I think it would have been just find to continue in the debate forum. It appears as though it was moved back to Parenting Concerns and then locked, which, IMO wasn't really fair to us as posters.
Normal me again. I was very tempted to add, after typing out all of that, then seeing how things went, "And there are some of us that are more articulate than others, and I see no reason why the inarticulate weenies should ruin it for the rest of us."
But I'm a good girl, so I didn't.
That said, my comments about stagnating forums are correct. As an example, my due date boards. Board A is very nice-nice, and no one disagrees on parenting things because they don't want to hurt feelings or make anyone feel like a bad mom or anything like that. Board B has some of the most unusual and noisiest debates on the Parenting Community. And we've debated it all. Board A is extremely slow these days, and there's nothing on it but "the baby cut another tooth" and "S/he's walking!" Board B is still having insightful and entertaining discussions on everything from WIC to Extended Nursing to American Idol to the lastest episode of Desperate Housewives. Board B used to be known as the "mean" board. Actually, after a car seat debate over there, in which Board B people came over and got snitty, it held on to the title of Mean Board. Anyway, I love Board B. Yeah, so we squabble and bitch and moan, but should one of our members be insulted by some other board, we've got their back. :)
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
The Bad Mom Complex
It's alive and well.
We've all seen it. Someone asks, "When did you feed your baby meat?" The first person responds with, "Around a year," and the next person responds with, "I guess I'm a bad mom, but....etc, etc."
When did Bad Mom enter the equation? I didn't see it in the prior questions. I theorize that the bad mom excuse makes an appearance when a perfectly reasonable mom is suddenly finding herself uncomfortable with her decision. The sudden second guessing immediately sets off an alarm in every other mommy's brain because at some point, we've all felt that we're thought of as a bad mom by someone. Unfortunately, this requires the 493 responding posters to quote Bad Mom's post and reply with, "You're NOT a bad mom. I did such-and-such." This takes the focus off of the OP and turns the post into one long pat on the back thread for the so-called Bad Mom.
There's something we need to realize. Different does not equal bad. There are some things that are bad decisions, sure. Using an expired car seat, feeding a baby fruits and veggies at the ripe old age of three months, turning and infant's car seat around at 7 months because they're screaming at the top of their lungs, telling your kids you'll let the monster in the closet have them for breakfast if they don't stay in bed, CIO, and I even put formula feeding because somebody offered to pay for it (and and using that as the determining factor) when you've got two perfectly good breasts and no particular reason to avoid using them in the category.
That said, there's a world of difference between a bad decision and a Bad Mom. Not one of us (mothers) will make the best decisions or even the right decisions all of the time. That's just a fact of life. My kids might go out once or twice underdressed for the unpredictable Kansas weather. Bad decision of me to not bring a coat, but does it make me a bad mom? Of course not. If I were a bad mom, I wouldn't even have coats for them. Instead, as soon as we get done with what we're doing, or they become uncomfortable with the temperature, we go inside or home and warm up. Eeny might eat McD's chicken nuggets for lunch one day. Bad dietary decision? Sure. But the next day he'll have a healthy lunch of chicken and veggies. It'd be nice if we, as mothers, generally took a party line of, We're human, we'll make bad decisions from time to time, and that's okay. It's not something to strive for, more something to understand and accept.
I put "I'm a bad mom" posts in the same category as, "If this is the way everyone feels, I'll leave the group because I don't want to be somewhere when people don't agree with me." Silly, and emotional blackmail, because it takes the focus off the disagreement and turns it into a "Love me" fest. I'm the first to admit that I usually don't know how to handle it when people disagree with me. It's uncomfortable. Why? Because it means that I might be wrong. It doesn't mean I am wrong, just that it's possible I might be. I don't like being wrong. I don't know anyone who does. It's just that it's possible, if someone else holds the opposite strong belief that I do, that they might be right, and I might not.
My feelings are not reality. I can feel that someone doesn't like me, but that doesn't make it true. When I make 5 phone calls and none of my friends and chat buddies are home, it might feel like no one likes me or is there for me, but that hardly makes it the case. So I can feel like there's a possibility that I might be wrong, but that doesn't make it true.
We've all seen it. Someone asks, "When did you feed your baby meat?" The first person responds with, "Around a year," and the next person responds with, "I guess I'm a bad mom, but....etc, etc."
When did Bad Mom enter the equation? I didn't see it in the prior questions. I theorize that the bad mom excuse makes an appearance when a perfectly reasonable mom is suddenly finding herself uncomfortable with her decision. The sudden second guessing immediately sets off an alarm in every other mommy's brain because at some point, we've all felt that we're thought of as a bad mom by someone. Unfortunately, this requires the 493 responding posters to quote Bad Mom's post and reply with, "You're NOT a bad mom. I did such-and-such." This takes the focus off of the OP and turns the post into one long pat on the back thread for the so-called Bad Mom.
There's something we need to realize. Different does not equal bad. There are some things that are bad decisions, sure. Using an expired car seat, feeding a baby fruits and veggies at the ripe old age of three months, turning and infant's car seat around at 7 months because they're screaming at the top of their lungs, telling your kids you'll let the monster in the closet have them for breakfast if they don't stay in bed, CIO, and I even put formula feeding because somebody offered to pay for it (and and using that as the determining factor) when you've got two perfectly good breasts and no particular reason to avoid using them in the category.
That said, there's a world of difference between a bad decision and a Bad Mom. Not one of us (mothers) will make the best decisions or even the right decisions all of the time. That's just a fact of life. My kids might go out once or twice underdressed for the unpredictable Kansas weather. Bad decision of me to not bring a coat, but does it make me a bad mom? Of course not. If I were a bad mom, I wouldn't even have coats for them. Instead, as soon as we get done with what we're doing, or they become uncomfortable with the temperature, we go inside or home and warm up. Eeny might eat McD's chicken nuggets for lunch one day. Bad dietary decision? Sure. But the next day he'll have a healthy lunch of chicken and veggies. It'd be nice if we, as mothers, generally took a party line of, We're human, we'll make bad decisions from time to time, and that's okay. It's not something to strive for, more something to understand and accept.
I put "I'm a bad mom" posts in the same category as, "If this is the way everyone feels, I'll leave the group because I don't want to be somewhere when people don't agree with me." Silly, and emotional blackmail, because it takes the focus off the disagreement and turns it into a "Love me" fest. I'm the first to admit that I usually don't know how to handle it when people disagree with me. It's uncomfortable. Why? Because it means that I might be wrong. It doesn't mean I am wrong, just that it's possible I might be. I don't like being wrong. I don't know anyone who does. It's just that it's possible, if someone else holds the opposite strong belief that I do, that they might be right, and I might not.
My feelings are not reality. I can feel that someone doesn't like me, but that doesn't make it true. When I make 5 phone calls and none of my friends and chat buddies are home, it might feel like no one likes me or is there for me, but that hardly makes it the case. So I can feel like there's a possibility that I might be wrong, but that doesn't make it true.
Monday, March 20, 2006
Hmmmm...
I could handle this:
I went to Friend H's house today to finish laying out The Rooster's quilt. Then I decided I didn't like the fabric I'd picked out to alternate between the cute little rails of fabric. Picture when it's done.
Here's the sling I made for the Rooster yesterday:
I can see where it needs some work, and for the next one I do, I'll remember that.
Great news--Friend A is pregnant!!! :) She and her husband have been trying for over a year. I'm so happy for them!
Yay! A snuggly newborn I don't have to gestate and deliver! :D
...and there was much rejoicing.
| You Belong in Rome |
 You're a big city girl with a small town heart Which is why you're attracted to the romance of Rome Strolling down picture perfect streets, cappuccino in hand And gorgeous Italian men - could life get any better? |
I went to Friend H's house today to finish laying out The Rooster's quilt. Then I decided I didn't like the fabric I'd picked out to alternate between the cute little rails of fabric. Picture when it's done.
Here's the sling I made for the Rooster yesterday:
I can see where it needs some work, and for the next one I do, I'll remember that.
Great news--Friend A is pregnant!!! :) She and her husband have been trying for over a year. I'm so happy for them!
Yay! A snuggly newborn I don't have to gestate and deliver! :D
...and there was much rejoicing.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Yay!
I went to a LLL meeting on the other side of town. I met another Gerry fan. Yay! I'm not the only freak in My Fair City. :D
The Trainwreck has done it. The Trainwreck was supposed to have been the third partner in The Practice (doula work). Her communication has been iffy from the beginning, but as of today, she's out. She spent TWO HUNDRED freaking DOLLARS on a domain name for us. A step we were not yet ready to take. Ack, ack, ack. More later. I'm currently sending an envelope containing something hilarious to one of the Bitches. :) I'm not saying what it is in case she reads this. Maybe if people left comments, I'd know. :P
The Trainwreck has done it. The Trainwreck was supposed to have been the third partner in The Practice (doula work). Her communication has been iffy from the beginning, but as of today, she's out. She spent TWO HUNDRED freaking DOLLARS on a domain name for us. A step we were not yet ready to take. Ack, ack, ack. More later. I'm currently sending an envelope containing something hilarious to one of the Bitches. :) I'm not saying what it is in case she reads this. Maybe if people left comments, I'd know. :P
Sunday, March 12, 2006
It's my 150th post!
Since it is my 150th entry, I was going to do a list of all things 15o. However, Strong Bad has only answered 147 emails, so that plan has fallen through.
I will, however, blog about several things.
1) It is rude of DarthHusband to interrupt a sex dream involving Guess Who on a morning I'm supposed to be sleeping in, and deposit a baby in my arms and claim, "He's hungry and needs a nap." That always ends the dream. Too bad.
2) I'm thinking of things. I've come to the conclusion that I just don't know where the boundaries in my marriage are or should be. We're in the midst of a renegotiation of them, and it's not particularly comfortable. The biggest disservice growing up in the Church has done my marriage is the idea that the Christian Wife submits to her husband translating into The Christian Wife becoming a doormat.
So, I'm thinking of stuff like this:
--If I have not gotten to the laundry or the dishes, and dinner is not ready, you have two choices: You may occupy the children without complaining, or you can do those chores yourself, also without complaining. I do what I can when you're gone, but once you're home, it's time to pitch in.
--You may not take off for your evening bathroom visit while both children are still in high chairs. You're not the only one who needs to pee and get ready to put small children to bed.
That's it for now. I think we're coming up on some actual boundary defining, and that's a positive thing.
I will, however, blog about several things.
1) It is rude of DarthHusband to interrupt a sex dream involving Guess Who on a morning I'm supposed to be sleeping in, and deposit a baby in my arms and claim, "He's hungry and needs a nap." That always ends the dream. Too bad.
2) I'm thinking of things. I've come to the conclusion that I just don't know where the boundaries in my marriage are or should be. We're in the midst of a renegotiation of them, and it's not particularly comfortable. The biggest disservice growing up in the Church has done my marriage is the idea that the Christian Wife submits to her husband translating into The Christian Wife becoming a doormat.
So, I'm thinking of stuff like this:
--If I have not gotten to the laundry or the dishes, and dinner is not ready, you have two choices: You may occupy the children without complaining, or you can do those chores yourself, also without complaining. I do what I can when you're gone, but once you're home, it's time to pitch in.
--You may not take off for your evening bathroom visit while both children are still in high chairs. You're not the only one who needs to pee and get ready to put small children to bed.
That's it for now. I think we're coming up on some actual boundary defining, and that's a positive thing.
Monday, March 06, 2006
Not going...
On my trip to my workshop. Eeny's still pretty freaked out about DH's ER trip. He left for work this morning, and Eeny said, "Daddy went to the hospitabil? Daddy's sick?" and he started crying. I felt so badly for him. I think it would be cruel of me to take off on a four day trip when he's never been away from me for more than a night before.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, the Gerry Butler references have returned! I'm playing Six Degrees of Gerard Butler here: http://oracleofbacon.org/star_links.html
So far, I've found exactly one actor with more than two degrees--Cuba Gooding. Not Junior.
Even Connie Booth (ex-wife of John Cleese) has only two degrees of separation from him. Regardless of whether he intends to, Master Gerry gets around.
After an hour of playing (I need a hobby), I've found someone with more than two degrees!
"The Oracle says: Gerard Butler has a Cary Grant number of 3.
Gerard Butler was in Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) with Julian Rhind-Tutt
Julian Rhind-Tutt was in Rabbit Fever (2005) with John Standing (I)
John Standing (I) was in Walk Don't Run (1966) with Cary Grant"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Off to bed for me, then.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, the Gerry Butler references have returned! I'm playing Six Degrees of Gerard Butler here: http://oracleofbacon.org/star_links.html
So far, I've found exactly one actor with more than two degrees--Cuba Gooding. Not Junior.
Even Connie Booth (ex-wife of John Cleese) has only two degrees of separation from him. Regardless of whether he intends to, Master Gerry gets around.
After an hour of playing (I need a hobby), I've found someone with more than two degrees!
"The Oracle says: Gerard Butler has a Cary Grant number of 3.
Gerard Butler was in Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) with Julian Rhind-Tutt
Julian Rhind-Tutt was in Rabbit Fever (2005) with John Standing (I)
John Standing (I) was in Walk Don't Run (1966) with Cary Grant"
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Off to bed for me, then.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
"The Epi-pen is deceptive."
So said DarthHusband to me yesterday, upon his release from the Emergency Room. Thank God for that deceptive little pen. It saved his life. He had another reaction yesterday morning. We don't really know what it was that triggered it. It might have been the apple, or it could have been the bite of chocolate processed in a facility that also processes nuts. At any rate, he told me he thought he might have to use his pen. Within seconds, his arms were breaking out in a rash, and his nose turned bright red while his face went pale. He gave himself his injection, and I called 911.
EMS arrived within about 5 minutes, and the pen and the Benadryl were doing their job. His skin was clearing up, and his airway stayed open. His blood pressure was practically perfect when taken at the house by EMS, and aside from being a little jittery from the epinephrine, he seemed okay.
Eeny was watching Finding Nemo when they arrived. The Rooster stayed on my hip the whole time, which is unusual for Mister Must. Get. Down. One of the firefighters tried to talk to Eeny a little bit. The kid was having none of it. He got into his toybox and sat there and gave the firefighter monosyllabic answers. Then, he remained glued to the window while they put DH on the gurney and into the back of the ambulance. After it left, he cried for Daddy a few times, but otherwise seemed okay.
I would have taken him to the ER myself, seeing as how we're only 5 minutes away, but we've been chained to the bathroom this week, and Saturday was no exception. We also ran out of toilet paper. Yes, you can laugh. It's funny. Fortunately, my parents were already on their way with TP and Powerade by the time the reaction started.
Eeny acted out a bit the rest of the day. New thing: he can now say "paramedic."
We told him Daddy got sick and he went to the hospital to make him feel better. Having him come home that day helped, I think. He was still scared and wouldn't go to him for the first hour or two. It made DH feel really bad. The Rooster, on the other hand, had zero qualms about going to Daddy. As soon as DH woke up from his Benadryl nap, Rooster crawled over to him, pulled up on the couch beside him, and put the Motrin syringe (the needle-free kind for all of the uber-safety concerned) into DH's mouth. It was adorable:
Anyway, after a few minutes, and the promise of another showing of Finding Nemo (this time without an ambulance to interrupt it), Eeny snuggled up beside Dh to eat his oatmeal and watch his "fish movie." My poor baby. He's such a sensitive kid. I really hope this hasn't hurt him. A friend of mine's a play therapist. I'll have to ask her what to do next.
As to why the Epi-pen is deceptive, DarthHusband was expecting a small lancet, not unlike the autoclick my aunt had for blood sugar testing. He put the pen on his leg, pushed the button, held it for the required ten seconds, and pulled it out. And kept pulling. He was not expecting a 2 inch needle. He kept it with him while he went to the hospital. The staff there asked him why. Generally considerate father that he is, he said he didn't want to leave it anywhere at home where the children could get it.
At any rate, this allergic reaction stuff is obnoxious. I'm now sharing in my husband's nervousness, and eating is starting to make both of us nervous. Every time I have the tiniest itch, I get worried it's a reaction. It might be a good idea for me to eventually see someone about this freakish anxiety business.
We have to get the allergy testing redone. DH was in the early stages of meningitis when he was tested, and the ER doc said that since he's apparently reacted both times to things that were not tested for, it might be a good idea to get them done again, as the meningitis could have skewed the results. My paranoid self is wanting allergy testing for the whole family, just to double check and make sure we can keep everyone in as much check as possible.
:::sigh:::
This isn't much fun.
EMS arrived within about 5 minutes, and the pen and the Benadryl were doing their job. His skin was clearing up, and his airway stayed open. His blood pressure was practically perfect when taken at the house by EMS, and aside from being a little jittery from the epinephrine, he seemed okay.
Eeny was watching Finding Nemo when they arrived. The Rooster stayed on my hip the whole time, which is unusual for Mister Must. Get. Down. One of the firefighters tried to talk to Eeny a little bit. The kid was having none of it. He got into his toybox and sat there and gave the firefighter monosyllabic answers. Then, he remained glued to the window while they put DH on the gurney and into the back of the ambulance. After it left, he cried for Daddy a few times, but otherwise seemed okay.
I would have taken him to the ER myself, seeing as how we're only 5 minutes away, but we've been chained to the bathroom this week, and Saturday was no exception. We also ran out of toilet paper. Yes, you can laugh. It's funny. Fortunately, my parents were already on their way with TP and Powerade by the time the reaction started.
Eeny acted out a bit the rest of the day. New thing: he can now say "paramedic."
We told him Daddy got sick and he went to the hospital to make him feel better. Having him come home that day helped, I think. He was still scared and wouldn't go to him for the first hour or two. It made DH feel really bad. The Rooster, on the other hand, had zero qualms about going to Daddy. As soon as DH woke up from his Benadryl nap, Rooster crawled over to him, pulled up on the couch beside him, and put the Motrin syringe (the needle-free kind for all of the uber-safety concerned) into DH's mouth. It was adorable:
Anyway, after a few minutes, and the promise of another showing of Finding Nemo (this time without an ambulance to interrupt it), Eeny snuggled up beside Dh to eat his oatmeal and watch his "fish movie." My poor baby. He's such a sensitive kid. I really hope this hasn't hurt him. A friend of mine's a play therapist. I'll have to ask her what to do next.
As to why the Epi-pen is deceptive, DarthHusband was expecting a small lancet, not unlike the autoclick my aunt had for blood sugar testing. He put the pen on his leg, pushed the button, held it for the required ten seconds, and pulled it out. And kept pulling. He was not expecting a 2 inch needle. He kept it with him while he went to the hospital. The staff there asked him why. Generally considerate father that he is, he said he didn't want to leave it anywhere at home where the children could get it.
At any rate, this allergic reaction stuff is obnoxious. I'm now sharing in my husband's nervousness, and eating is starting to make both of us nervous. Every time I have the tiniest itch, I get worried it's a reaction. It might be a good idea for me to eventually see someone about this freakish anxiety business.
We have to get the allergy testing redone. DH was in the early stages of meningitis when he was tested, and the ER doc said that since he's apparently reacted both times to things that were not tested for, it might be a good idea to get them done again, as the meningitis could have skewed the results. My paranoid self is wanting allergy testing for the whole family, just to double check and make sure we can keep everyone in as much check as possible.
:::sigh:::
This isn't much fun.
Friday, March 03, 2006
So, we have these issues, see...
I was 16 when I met DarthHusband. He was 21. We started dating when I was 17, got engaged at 18, and got married two months after I turned 20. We found out I was pregnant right after I turned 21, and I got pregnant again at 22, had The Rooster at 23, and here I am at 24, and I'm realizing some things.
I grew up with a very strong father figure. My dad was a student, and worked really long hours trying to finish up his doctorate. Even though he wasn't often around in the evenings, he was at the plays, games, and school events. His rules and his presence were felt, even if he wasn't there. Don't get me wrong, I have an awesome dad. He's smart, he's funny, and he knows how to talk me through my anxiety (something DH has never learned how to do), and he loves me very much.
Unfortunately, I never really got to see him and my mom in action together. I didn't really see the division of labor, as it were. I do remember him pitching in easily around the house (still does), and getting things cleaned up, and making dinner, all without being told.
I guess what happened in my case is that DH took over some of the fathering roles. I had only lived by myself for six months before we got married. Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I'd chosen to stay living by myself and we'd broken up....
Like the ribbon? It's my Two Years of Breastfeeding award. I like it. I think I shall put it in the margins, since I have just recently figured out this html business.
I grew up with a very strong father figure. My dad was a student, and worked really long hours trying to finish up his doctorate. Even though he wasn't often around in the evenings, he was at the plays, games, and school events. His rules and his presence were felt, even if he wasn't there. Don't get me wrong, I have an awesome dad. He's smart, he's funny, and he knows how to talk me through my anxiety (something DH has never learned how to do), and he loves me very much.
Unfortunately, I never really got to see him and my mom in action together. I didn't really see the division of labor, as it were. I do remember him pitching in easily around the house (still does), and getting things cleaned up, and making dinner, all without being told.
I guess what happened in my case is that DH took over some of the fathering roles. I had only lived by myself for six months before we got married. Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I'd chosen to stay living by myself and we'd broken up....
Like the ribbon? It's my Two Years of Breastfeeding award. I like it. I think I shall put it in the margins, since I have just recently figured out this html business.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
No Gerry Butler Reference Today
Eeny just informed me he watched “Tickle-y Town Heroes.” It’s really Higglytown Heroes, and I hate that show. But I’m in here on the computer, doing Useful and Important things. Okay, not really. I’m putting off going downstairs to get Eeny’s shorts so he can go outside and take advantage of the weather. It’s 75 today. I’m feeling “a whole lot better,” at least I will if I can get some protein into me. DarthHusband has been taken down by an ugly stomach bug, and it seems he got what I had. Ugh.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Update from later this evening.
My mom took Eeny to his very first dance class tonight (I'm exhausted, and now Brandon's got The Sickness). Okay, so according to Daddy, who is Manly and Stuff, it's "gross motor movement" and it's called "Hop, Skip, Jump," but he was the only boy in a room full of pink tutus, so it's a damn dance class.
Anyway, she said he did really well for having never been in a group class before, and he really liked getting a car stamp on his hand. I asked him if he had dance class tonight, and he said yes. Then I asked him if he liked dance class. His response?
"I love dancing ballet."
Heh. That's my boy.
Take that, Daddy.
In other news, The Rooster has lately been holding a small squish pillow above his head, then flinging it down to the floor, and simultaneously landing on top of it, face first. This works really well, and is a crack up to watch, that is, until he decides to try this on the hardwood floor in the living room, and forgets to toss the pillow first. The poor baby has a nice big purple bruise, right in the middle of his forehead.
In still more other news, Eeny hung out at my dad's office a little tonight, and we've now discovered his first Big Fear. My eldest son is afraid of....................... (drumroll please).....................................
......................chickens. Yes, chickens.
Mom told me he got very upset at the sight of the Fisher~Price barn and farm yard, and started talking about the chickens behind the fence and saying he was scared of the chickens. I'd forgotten--when we were at the zoo last week in the petting section, he walked over to the outside of the fowl pen and was promptly rushed by a goose. Fortunately, a long talk about how there are no chickens in our house, and a few rounds of the "That Chicken's Got the Hiccups" song by The Wiggles seem to have done the trick for tonight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Update from later this evening.
My mom took Eeny to his very first dance class tonight (I'm exhausted, and now Brandon's got The Sickness). Okay, so according to Daddy, who is Manly and Stuff, it's "gross motor movement" and it's called "Hop, Skip, Jump," but he was the only boy in a room full of pink tutus, so it's a damn dance class.
Anyway, she said he did really well for having never been in a group class before, and he really liked getting a car stamp on his hand. I asked him if he had dance class tonight, and he said yes. Then I asked him if he liked dance class. His response?
"I love dancing ballet."
Heh. That's my boy.
Take that, Daddy.
In other news, The Rooster has lately been holding a small squish pillow above his head, then flinging it down to the floor, and simultaneously landing on top of it, face first. This works really well, and is a crack up to watch, that is, until he decides to try this on the hardwood floor in the living room, and forgets to toss the pillow first. The poor baby has a nice big purple bruise, right in the middle of his forehead.
In still more other news, Eeny hung out at my dad's office a little tonight, and we've now discovered his first Big Fear. My eldest son is afraid of....................... (drumroll please).....................................
......................chickens. Yes, chickens.
Mom told me he got very upset at the sight of the Fisher~Price barn and farm yard, and started talking about the chickens behind the fence and saying he was scared of the chickens. I'd forgotten--when we were at the zoo last week in the petting section, he walked over to the outside of the fowl pen and was promptly rushed by a goose. Fortunately, a long talk about how there are no chickens in our house, and a few rounds of the "That Chicken's Got the Hiccups" song by The Wiggles seem to have done the trick for tonight.
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